Letting our bodies do what they need to do…

Where my persona is today…

Our bodies are in the 3rd and 4th dimensional manifestations of our soul. Through our bodies, our soul gets things done because what we do in this dimension makes more of an impact than what we can do on the astral levels. I’m still learning this first-hand, but I will write what I know and from the perspective I experience it.

There are so many species of beings out there… star seeds, fae, nymphs, humans, etc., so we will have differences in some of our experiences, but merge in others. Since our bodies are these manifestations of our higher selves, we should recognize and connect to our souls and allow it to accomplish unity and purpose within us.

What I mean by “let it do what it needs to do” is, anytime we need to express something, we should just do it, but with fun and joy. Sometimes my body wants me to wave my arms or twist, so I do and it moves stagnant energy I didn’t know I had and I’m happy. If we fight ourselves we accomplish nothing. Doing simple things that your body asks will make it easier to hear your soul ask you to do things in order to work out your karma, heal or grow. If we deny these things about ourselves, we backlog our own growth and understanding of how things truly are. We deny ourselves truth.

I’ve written about where all of our energy and creativity lies, and that’s at the source of who we are… the seat of our soul/higher selves. Our source is our busy little workshop that makes everything we see possible. Our battles are worked out in the shop, not in our daily/waking lives. Our souls have planned out our day and when we resist the things that happens in it, all we do is steal energy from our source and begin wearing ourselves out. That’s why we are so tired all the time and we can’t change our lives that way.

The situations we face during the day were created specifically for you and no one else. Everything was created beforehand in your workshop and is perfectly timed and we see the right outcome if we stick to the plan. If we ever want to change what we see, it begins with our thoughts and our beliefs on the matter that then goes to the drawing board of our workshop and is hashed out from there. A woman today bought a scale that measures weight and said she’s thinking skinny, or something to that effect. A scale is only going to confirm what we are already thinking and believe about ourselves… “we are overweight and need to lose weight” and that is what it represents. It’s the thoughts that lead up to that, the thoughts that I chose that begin to awaken my consciousness about things. These thoughts could look like this… “I use way too many disposable things [coffee cups, tissue], I should find a way to use a handkerchief instead [or a washable travel cup]”. That leads me to feeling better about who I am, so I begin to understand that certain foods aren’t helping me feel good about myself, so I change how I look at food, and my garbage, and then it just grows from there and all of a sudden, my whole lifestyle has changed for the better. That is such a leap from buying a scale to get skinny, because life is a lifestyle, not a short-term fix or goal.

Waking up each day is my soul resetting my fuckups and hoping I get it right today. Everything is planned out, I just need to trust that everything’s okay and choose peace and harmony with it. There is nothing I need to fight for, I just need to be available and work with my soul to accomplish what it’s telling me to do at that time it tells me to do it. Just go about my day and be available.

When my soul says, “You should do that 15 minute yoga thing you did the other day when you get home tonight”, and if I go home and do it, bam, accomplished. When it says, “Hey, instead of being afraid of your anger right now, why don’t you let it go with them and take this to your desk and let’s square this away together”. Accomplished, done. It takes less effort, time and energy to work together, than to fight. I believe that there is more that is worth surrendering for than fighting for. Every time I chose to fight myself, it gets put back on the drawing board to deal with over and over.

My focus in life isn’t anything more than this. It’s just today… and it’s just this moment.

It’s a beautifully orchestrated piece if we can flow with the music of our life and not feel guilty about it. Anytime we feel fear, our soul will give us the answer if we ask.

We are the creators of our experience…

Where my persona was November 2016…

The most beautiful story of all isn’t in print, it’s what’s being created right now, and right now and right now and right now, right now, and now… it’s in THIS second, not a second ago or the next one.

Everything can change for you right this second.

There is no past, only memories of the past, but I can change the past by what I do with this moment – I can rewrite my entire story if I wanted to, and I have many times. I have no debt to the past. I need not worry because now changes everything.

This concept pertains to creating new outcomes, not disregarding responsibility in your life.

Right now, you are living the life of your dreams, and if you are not happy, go inward and look at your core beliefs and desires, there’s the culprit. It’s not your surroundings; it’s your core manifesting what you are now seeing.

It takes strength and courage to become introspective and change what you find you don’t want anymore. Becoming introspective means foregoing the influence of others on what you decide is of value and replacing it with what you discover meets your needs in order to thrive and live your truth. What this looks like is, you… sitting alone with yourself and asking very hard questions and then wait… wait… wait for the answers and when they come, acting on those answers despite logic and everything else. It’s leaping and trusting in that inner knowing that this is the right thing to do, and that this is what you’ve been waiting for in your life all along.

As you do this over and over, you can go deeper into your core and change everything. Your core is this conference room where everything is decided, where everything is discussed and where everything is set in motion to manifest what’s been decided there, you will begin to see everything you are experiencing right now change. You will begin to understand that it’s where you and the universe hash out everything and, that whatever you ask for, the universe will conspire to give you – unbiased. Just remember, the universe does not correct your mistakes, it just makes it happen.

This is our design. This is life.

Life is the act of creation and death is only the further advancement of that creation. We don’t die; we shift timelines to fulfill our purpose until we get it right… over and over and over. That’s why we experience Déjà vu, we’ve been there many times to get it right. People fear physical death and allow themselves to be distracted by something that doesn’t exist because we are simply transitioning into other states of being each time. There is no entity waiting to judge us. We are accountable to ourselves and karma, but when we get it right, harmony transcends that karma. There is no good or bad/right or wrong, only cause and effect. Succumbing to the judgment of anything other than ourselves is less than who we are. We aren’t here to be good in hopes for a reward someday; we are here to be in service to each other’s spiritual growth at the level of consciousness we are operating from in order to work out our own obligations. We chose our lives before we came here, and that is the purpose of life, to remember who we are and recreate everything we see according to our own desires. We aren’t meant to live our lives limited and in fear.

An example of this is the scarecrow effect: I was driving down the road in a residential area and there was a device that measures your speed and tells you what that speed is. If you go over a certain speed, it flashes at you. If you exceed 10mph it flashes blue and red [simulating the lights of a police car that’s pulled you over to give you a ticket] How do I know this? Not going to lie, I enjoy the thought of pushing it there in hopes it will blow a fuse]. I am unable to put into words how annoying it is to drive 20mph in a 30mph because people are paralyzed with the fear because of this thing.

All I could see was this picture of a scarecrow in a field duping crows into fearing for their own safety when there is no danger. And the arrogance of it all – crows are simply doing what they were designed to do. Speeding devices aren’t clever, but a bit insulting. It’s designed for people who don’t abide by them [nor do they really care] anyway, and the rest simply can’t think for themselves and overcompensate, so it ups the ante from insulting to absurdity.

I’m not advocating breaking the law, I’m simply stating the overrated status of being a law abiding citizen at the expense of being innately what we are designed to be, which is for me to decide. I’m astounded and grieved by what we allow others to impose on us.

Sans chaos, take a stand and embrace yourself as you are and push the boundaries of what you are capable of when left to your own devices. It’s worth figuring out what that means because there is something amazing waiting, believe me, this world isn’t it. The standard is inside you. It’s a world where you don’t need to be told what to do, because you are already doing it, and this frees up all of your time to focus on what is important – your purpose.

The fear of being pulled over doesn’t inspire love. Choosing to be as courteous and safe as you can because you value yourself and others is what inspires love. Striving to be perfect is not Love, just being who you are and living your truth is what inspires Love. Life isn’t about rules, it’s about freedom. If you can’t learn how to free yourself from this world, then you will always be bound by the rules in it. Stop and ask yourself what you think and question things. It’s really okay to do your own thing entirely. Unplug and ask yourself what inspires love [in yourself and others], and if you can be a part of changing the world, simply by changing yourself.

A little about me and looking beneath the surface…

I’m a 39 year old, never married, being of strength, temperance and temper. I’m an artist, creator, introvert, psychic, manifestor, connected to the source of Love, healer, highly sensitive, go to war, protector type – yeah, I can be intense at times. I’ve died already in this lifetime [described below] and it’s possible I’ve transitioned time lines more than once, so it’s not a fear of mine. I began awakening last year in 2015 after what I describe below happened and changed everything for me.

HOW “LOOKING BENEATH THE SURFACE BEGAN”

I was driving to work once day and saw a cloud that looked like a hand below a line, but pointing up to it. I took a picture of it because I felt it was significant [attached] and had thought of doing a lot of writing, but had no clue where that would lead. So, I made a FB page that is useless now, but friends told me I should put my writings and realizations out there, so I did, and it was the right time to do so because, the day that I put all of my writings here in WordPress, my FB page crashed and I lost everything. I have one woman to thank for this, but we only were able to speak briefly before she offered to get me out there. If you are reading, words cannot express, Thank You.

HOW I SWITCHED TIME LINES [some would say “died”, but we don’t ever die]

~At this time in my life, I didn’t know that death wasn’t a thing~

On August 12, 2015, I had surgery for a blood clot in my head – thrombosis of some sort – and my life changed drastically at that point. I had actually “died”, but since we don’t really die, I shifted timelines.

I sat down with a notebook and was doing an exercise that I had read on how to get in touch with guides that we all apparently have, so I opened a dialogue and things surfaced. After my guide introduced himself, I asked question after question and it went quickly. I had asked a question [I can’t remember what it was] and his answer was, “run, and don’t stop“.

What will happen if I stop? “you’ll die

Death is not a motivating factor for me to do anything, what else you got? “don’t stop running

I sure as hell wasn’t going to take up exercise, so I let it go, he could show me at a later time if that’s what he wanted. It took almost a year before I understood that, through all of the research and despair and depression I went through in facing myself and what I truly was, what he meant was “never stop searching for answers to who you are”. It had nothing to do with exercise after all. About a month or so ago, I found finally found out who I truly am, and why I’m here. I discovered my purpose. But before that time…

I’d gone through evolution after evolution with psychology, energy, spirits, buddha, jesus… I feel that the figures presented to us, untouchable and unattainable, are distractions if they do not serve the purpose of directing us within ourselves for the answer. There is no reason we should take the word of anyone above our own experience, especially if it comes from anything other than love and reverence for life.

All my life I’ve barely thrived after being dropped into the middle of the ocean to find my way back, but that is apparently what I planned for this life because of what it takes to do what I’m beginning to do now, why I’m here. It turns out that my biological mother and sister, in another life, put a curse on me and I came back to have it resolved. Whether you believe in those sorts of things or not is irrelevant, I lived it and I never want to go through that again. My guide telling me to never stop running or I’ll die was to find the man who cleared that curse. So many times I came close to giving up.

I feel it’s my purpose to live, research and write about the core issues that no one talks about anymore. I will write about many subjects, but I feel strongly about getting back to a reverence for life and what that means. I’m going through an intense healing from my past and the curse, so it may take a year or so to get to the core of my original desire for starting this blog. I’m feeling around in the dark, so bare with me. I may be able to talk about the curse one day and what my life had been like under it, but it’s difficult to put it out into the world right now.

I look forward to those that join me on this journey. The theme will be “looking beneath the surface”.

We will meet many beings that are aspects of who we are on this journey from the illusion of separateness to oneness… I am the aspect of you that wants to wake up.

We are all connected…

Where my persona was August 2016

We are all connected. We can all communicate with each other through energy.

We can all come into an empowerment to control our own lives, our emotions, and our perspective on what is true, without the influence of what you see around you.

There is only one [of two] force[s] that allows us to do this… Love.

It is a simple concept, but it is NOT what we’ve all thought it was all along. Nowhere close. In order to understand what I’m about to say, you must throw out everything you think you know about it.

We are coming into an age where people are going to begin to get it. It’s happening, and I, for one, am going to talk about it as much as I can. It is also going to change everything, because I am everything, you are everything. I’ve only ever felt this force in its fullest as a child, unconditionally, and sincerely. It is a reverence for all life. Period.

 

Connecting to Love goes hand in hand with the realization that a force, you cannot contain, wants to flow through you and connect you to everything. It wants you to fall in love with as many things as possible, because it is in love with everything possible. That is its gift, its power and intended use. I can’t fully understand what I’m about to say next, but everything serves a purpose, and it’s not possible to respect that without Love and a reverence for life.

Only you can experience Love [a reverence for life] for yourself, and it isn’t designed for someone else to give that to you – it’s a gift only you can give yourself, and that’s where everything begins, with you. It’s a difficult concept to grasp, but it’s not through logic that you will experience it anyway. We can only begin to open the flow of this force when we move away from the chatter of others and attune to our own feelings and intuition. Believe me, when you begin to discover your truth, others will surface that are like-minded.

Nothing that comes to your mind should be disregarded, it should be paid attention to with priority and followed. I feel that I must mention how important it is to kept this journey of self-discovery to yourself until you can have a solid grasp on what it is you are experiencing, if not, you’ll spiral even more or lose all sense of focus – if you are meant to share, someone will come into your life that you can have a safe space to do that with.

Our approach to this should not be the same approach we lend to a diet… it is a commitment to something bigger than ourselves. An awakening to step outside of the limits of this world and redefine everything in it.

At this very moment, my belief is that it’s likely we are NOT going to understand it in its entirety. It’s a flow and it never stops. It’s almost as if you can’t “experience” it, but surrender to it. It is boundless, expansive, powerful and holy. In order to get that, you’re also going to have to revamp what you think the word “holy” means also. I cannot expound on the purity of its force with any other word. If you seek to channel this life giving force in its intended form, it will open up everything you have ever needed in your life, by simply being [with it]. It’s a profound anchor to manifesting.

This is a lot to take in… I fluctuate between being lucid about this and feeling completely out of my element with the sense of how much it goes against the grain of my metal. All I know is, that operating from this place of Love always brings my desired outcome, because it isn’t about others, it’s about me and my approach to everything I’ve called into existence [manifested for myself].

 

I have some examples below of how to possibly see this applied.

________________________________________

 

Thought patterns: Love vs. Fear

Fear – you are subject to the experiences of others. Love – you are subject to your own experience.

Scenario 1:

“Terri! Go fuck yourself”…

“Um, how ’bout ‘fuck YOU buddy'” [fear]

Scenario 2:

“Terri! Go fuck yourself”…

“If I’ve done something to hurt you, it’s my responsibility to apologize and make it right.” [love/reconciling karma]

[These are an example to make my point. Obviously, you shouldn’t stay/contend with toxic others if that’s the scenario]

Another Scenario:

“Why are you so [insert hurtful negative words]?” [fear]

“I’m sorry you feel that way, but I think that is how you are feel about yourself right now. Is there anything you want to talk about/resolve? I’m here to help if I can” [love/reconciling karma]

_________________________________________

Remember, there are only two: Love and Fear

 

This is very new territory for me, but it’s one that has proven true without a doubt, and I didn’t come from “learned responses”. Therapists are an appropriate example of who use learned responses, for legal purposes, they have to. I came from a sense of being present and responding to the situation from that need in that moment in time.

 

It must also be said that nothing is black and white. I have been working to manifest this Love, but couldn’t manifest it how I needed to until I had a curse removed. Freaky, right? I thought it was something you read about. I’ll go into that another time, unless someone has questions, I’m happy to answer what I know at this stage. I am determined to devote my time in learning more about it, but for now, it’s lifted and I can manifest with more clarity. Bev, I’ll talk with you more about this one-on-one, but if anyone knows anything about curses, or knows someone who does know, please send them my way. I won’t friend request someone I don’t know, but if they can message me that they are your friend, I’ll friend them. I am pretty passionate about this topic since it’s hit so close to home for me.

 

In conclusion, I want to assure you that this age of experiencing Love is GOING to happen, so don’t get frustrated if it gets overwhelming, whatever you can to help raise the vibration is what matters – intent. There are those set in place for this specific time to ensure that it manifests. I believe I am here for that purpose because that truth resonates with me, and it took me time to stabilize with that resolve but it is my truth, so. I don’t remember a time where I’ve felt that I belonged here, and I knew I wasn’t truly indigenous.

 

I must mention and give heartfelt gratitude to a friend for working through the curse with me, and helping me see the potential in myself of who I am and how to slowly find and follow my path.

 

There aren’t words to describe being free from a curse unless you have experienced it – and I’d never wish this for anyone over any dispute, hurt, control or jealousy – basically all bi-products of a fear-based mentality. I’ve been fortunate to find this person to be there when it does surface again, or when I have questions or feel alone in this journey.

 

Because of what we have been indoctrinated to believe our whole lives, we have to keep in mind that, we will vacillate between sense and nonsense because everything we have perceived is changing, and that’s always grounds for instability. Be kind to yourself and others. We are all operating from our own level of consciousness.

A reverence for life…

Where my persona was August 2016

A Reverence for Life…

Every day, we see life, and walk on by because our thoughts are wrapped up in past or future events. I find it difficult to be ‘present’ because it is usually seen as unproductive or unconventional to self-express my creativity.

When I was a child, I loved the things I had so much that I named each one and treated them the same as I did people. I didn’t really want what others had [though I enjoyed them], my imagination was always much more exciting. Having that within myself felt spiritual on a level I could not feel with people, which explains why I was always alone and in nature.

I didn’t know that my belongings were alive with my energy as I gave them significance in this world in relation to me. This would be a glimpse into how to create life in and around me as an adult.

I seem to have this intense focus when I want to and I find that it only takes 24 hours sometimes to manifest what I want. I tend to love all my creations deeply, and that includes the people that come in and out… Whoever comes in, and whatever goes out of my life is evidence of what I’m creating, an aspect of who I am, what I’m thinking, and where I’m headed, which is why it’s so important to give our intentions thoughtfulness and reverence. It’s simultaneous in innocence and divine power.

This is why we should fall in love with everything in our lives.

I’ve also experienced what it’s like to manifest very dark things. This began when I allowed my family and others to dictate how I should behave and conduct myself. I thought it was natural because being innocent was no longer age appropriate.

I’d been rejected my whole life by those closest to me, and I wasn’t really fitting in with anyone I was coming across. Everything seemed to be so harsh and disappointing. I was lost and angry, and hurting others was not an option. I began to isolate and had a brief time where I experienced agoraphobia. I just could not function anymore it seemed.

This trauma created a huge riff between my soul and my experience. I didn’t realize the dark world I was about to create based expressly on the negative information and hurtful statements about “who I was” to them. Because of my abilities, my mother, who influenced the rest of my family, said very damaging things that she said she saw in me. I’ve only recently learned that we are mirrors to others, so what she was seeing in me, was truly what she didn’t want to see in herself. But it had been too late at that point, I was devastated.

There was no life to be found and to think I was capable of doing that to others paralyzed me. My recurring dreams were trying to warn me of my condition [picture attached]. I just sat there, suspended in a bubble, unable to move in any direction because it was so painful.

Life was over for me, and I had no idea how to get it back.

In 2015, I spent six months doing heavy and intense research on the different ways I could choose to painlessly exit and, knowing how fervent prayer works, I created mantras that I’d say all throughout the day to accelerate it. A few months later, what I was manifesting presented itself, and I transitioned, but didn’t know it. I believe I passed into another time line.

A blood clot had been removed from my head, apparently, but I felt amazing. Nothing inside me was the same, even though my surroundings didn’t change much. The only thing to do was dig myself out of the hole I’d previously put myself in, which was simply bullshit, but that is where I was.

I opened myself up to guides and was told to never stop running. I made matrix after matrix to manifest change for myself and bring about a different world altogether. I read Manifesting Change by Mike Dooley, found a book called Everything Toltec Wisdom and a few on quantum physics. Things were happening, my perspective on the world was changing and, even though I was still very angry inside, I knew I was on the right path to healing everything. Not sure what my purpose was, but I had a long way to go maybe.

I had come to a point where I knew that I could change everything, and I struggled because it was scary knowing I was responsible for everything I saw and the potential I had to change it. I get why it’s easier to have religion [aka scapegoats] to fall back on to take responsibility for our shitty manifestations and why we have a right to stay there.

I decided that I’d go back to creating life again, so I connected with my things and asked for their help as I struggled to enlighten. And as beautiful as it was to discover what I could do so far, the world felt very cruel as it shattered into pieces and came together, fell back to pieces and reformed… expanding and contracting – over and over and over.

I had to stop asking myself how I felt about anything because I was just too exhausted and I couldn’t do it anymore at times. I knew I could never go back, and it felt like all I could do was crawl forward when I couldn’t walk anymore. It paid off, because I felt myself altering my environment and time, along with anything else I did not like and wanted to change. When you discover that you can manipulate your reality, it’s INCREDIBLE, coupled with cautious awareness that there’s something bigger to answer to now. A lot like holding a loaded weapon; everything changes in proximity to it.

Knowing that we have abilities and limitless opportunity to recreate ourselves and our environment does a lot to put things in perspective. When we discover this, it’s not long after that that we begin to merge with the concept of respecting life and what we do with it.

How to experience Harmony…

Persona November 2016…

Harmony supersedes karma.

The hardest lesson I learned was what it was like to live in a moment in time, all its own.

 

I was always obsessed with my past and the future, crazy with worry and frustration. I was driving into work one day, losing my shit, and in a single moment, I believe I was given a gift to experience a world with a complete lack of fear or worry. I know now that I was reaping a seed I planted.

 

That gift was another one of those moments that changed everything. Because of that, I try to plant as many seeds as I can so that I can keep getting these gifts when I need them. I will never stop evolving, but the things that I looked to at that time to hold my fragile world together were, topically, band aid philosophies.

 

To this day, I don’t discount the value of those band aids, I had a lot of work to do on my thoughts, and that was how I did it, it’s just not okay to stay there.

 

I needed depth, and what I had just felt was much deeper than anything else. I’m sure the majority of us know what being submerged in a pool is like as a kid… everything stops. Your sibling and her mean friend doesn’t exist, mom and work doesn’t exist, homework doesn’t exist… just your thoughts about it, is all.

 

Most of us chose to let go and enjoy the serenity. Better yet, create a world within it with our imaginations. That’s exactly what it’s like to live in a moment. You aren’t in debt to anything. We are gifted the opportunity to connect to endless possibilities with what is right in front of us, not wrapped up in the past, but with the ability to dictate our future.

Emotional and Spiritual Pain: How to let go…

Persona October 2016

Sadness, depression and anxiety have their place in our lives, but to be haunted and oppressed is another story. I once went to a two day seminar and what I learned on handling those intense feelings begs to be shared today…

It’s an exercise that should be done with two people, and the other person should be someone that supports you in your healing, or you can do this in front of a mirror, but you need a counterpart.

Letting Go:

[During this exercise, your counterpart will remain unemotional and unattached to your experience, but sending you loving energy to heal]

  1. Begin talking about the experience that is hurting you. Don’t fight it and explain it in great detail.

 

  1. In the middle of its intensity, your counterpart will abruptly interrupt you and have you describe something on the wall in great detail [texture, color, etc].

 

  1. Once you’re calm, your counterpart will interrupt you and ask you to go back to describing the hurt.

 

  1. Once it reaches its intensity again, your counterpart will abruptly interrupt and have you, again, focus on the same object and describe it until you are calm again…

 

Your objective is to not rush your own feelings in order to calm yourself. Take your time because you are retraining/recalibrating how you handle dealing with this in the future. This is not an exercise in gaining sympathy from your counterpart, they are not there to rescue you, but support your own healing and take back control of your life.

If you find that this exercise isn’t serving you, you may want to look into deeper aspects of your suffering. Often times it’s because we don’t want to let go, or it could be that we are oppressed by something outside of ourselves, like I was. There are things you can’t do anything about sometimes, but need help with realizing and clearing so you can be yourself again and enjoy life.

If you feel there is something deep going on under the surface, we can figure out what that is, or I know someone who can. With what I know about my own experiences, whatever is happening is likely not going to be new under the sun or so foreign that it can’t be identified and resolved. I needed help in dealing with my own experience tied to my family history.

You have to trust yourself and what you are feeling about it in order to have others help your healing the rest of the way].

Diffusing the chaos and craziness of being an Empath…

Persona December 2016

Diffusing the Chaos and Craziness of being an Empath…

Learning the difference in, and importance of, emotions: When to transmute and when to deal.

As Empaths, it’s difficult at first to determine where everything is coming from and why we are drowning in it. The bottom line is, it’s either coming from an outside influence or from within.

Emotions surround many things… low self-esteem, negative energy [fear, sadness, hopelessness, anger], traumatic experiences, self-doubt, etc., and when we cope, instead of deal, it causes blocks in our energy and ultimately physical and mental health issues.

MENTAL HEALTH ISSUES

Mental issues are not necessarily permanent dis-eases. Most times it’s a simple neuroses of something we’ve refused to accept about who we are that’s manifest into such. If we can learn to accept and love whatever it is about ourselves that we couldn’t love before, it will begin to play out on its own, resolve, and we will heal… it’s called expanding your mind. We are taught that things should fit into a box, and when they don’t, they are diseases. My favorite movie that is a perfect example of this playing out is, Lars and the Real Girl [Ryan Gosling].

I had major depressive and anxiety disorder for over a decade simply because I had the limited belief that things had to be good or evil and right or wrong. Letting go of the fact that I had to be so wound tight in order to be “good” and not “evil” healed all of that. I was everything and all of it. The concept of multiplicity was a life-saver because it helped me realize that everything has a purpose. It also helped me realize that how I handle one scenario can change depending on the situation at a later time. There are so many ways to look at doing anything and everything. I just had to let go of the one belief that wasn’t serving my highest good to grab another that would help me move out of that.

COPING

Coping with feelings sends them into a “purgatory” state, which is its intended use for traumatic experiences, but it’s not a long-term solution. We ultimately have to deal.

So when we use coping on a daily basis and don’t deal with our feelings, everything begins to feel like an attack because the emotions have to come back around to resolve but we keep coping, they come back around and we are still coping. When we burn out on coping, we get this “me vs. something” mentality and it’s an all out war on ourselves that is completely unnecessary. Your feelings are trying to work with you, it’s you that isn’t working with them. Be gentle and kind, you both really want the same thing – harmony and sanity.

Okay, so negative emotions pop up… what should we do first?

The first question we need to ask ourselves every time is, “Is this me or is it something outside of me?”

DISTINGUISHING OUTSIDE INFLUENCES FROM INNER WORKINGS…

OUTSIDE INFLUENCES… and transmuting.

Outside Influences occur when you suddenly feel an emotion and have no logical reason to feel that way. I can tell it’s an outside influence when I’m going about my day and I suddenly feel angry or depressed out of the blue. It’s likely energy from something else around me, not me. On a day-to-day basis, we need to transmute these energies so that they no longer disrupt what we are doing and we can continue our lives.

INNER WORKINGS, SELF-LOVE… and transmuting.

Inner workings present themselves when you have suffered a loss, had a traumatic experience, lost a job, severed relationship [etc.] and you have just cause to feel such deep emotions about it.

These emotions are very important to pay attention to and take care of with time, forgiveness and kindness. They present themselves at the lowest level and, when ignored, escalate from there and ultimately end up manifesting into panic episodes or completely end up controlling you [making you feel crazy].

Inner workings of emotion are yours and they matter greatly. The biggest disservice you could do is minimize what you are going through because “someone else has it worse”. Please don’t ever say that to yourself again. Not only do they matter because they are yours, but your spiritual growth and guiding intuition depend on them. Work on yourself privately and don’t make your spiritual growth anyone else’s responsibility or business, unless the person was called into your life to support you.

When you feel you are giving proper attention to dealing with these deep emotions and they end up making you crazy, obsessive, or irrational, learn to transmute the crazy and make sure not fall back on coping.

TRANSMUTING…

  1. Take the emotion and focus it into a black ball that rests between your hands.

 

  1. Once it’s stabilized there… allow the force of Love to flow from the top of your head and out of your core where the ball rests.

 

  1. Lower the black ball into the flow and let Love sift and clear all impurities until it’s in a golden, solid state.

 

  1. The negative energy is now Love energy, release it back to source so it can heal.

 

*One very important thing is, Bach Flower Remedies. People have mixed feelings on using them, but it’s made a huge difference for me.

#4 Being an Empath doesn’t have to be a Curse… [removing uncertainty and unnecessary hurt from your life]

Persona December 2016

Start at the end and work backwards from there before making decisions.

 

A co-worker of mine invited me and five other non-family members over for Christmas to be with her family. I spent Thanksgiving with just her family and it was amazing, but I didn’t feel the energy would be the same this time.

It turns out my reservations were validated when she came to me, worried, that she probably made a mistake inviting people she doesn’t even know into her home on Christmas day. My uneasiness over it was also because she wanted me there because her son and I had a deep connection at Thanksgiving and he hasn’t been home for the holidays in five years, but he was coming and wanted to see me again. Since Thanksgiving, she’s been passing along messages from her son that he thinks I’m really sweet. It’s evident that they don’t know me. She kept conveying messages on his behalf and ignoring me when I said he could have my number, so I finally said, “Whatever, he can tell me himself”.

I wasn’t being lured and this display of an uncut umbilical cord between them was putting distance between our friendship. While she never said it, I sensed there was something she wanted from me and I was messing that up, and it made me feel sick. It’s been a roller coaster of emotions with the two of them and I finally needed to end the push/pull of it all.

I did what I felt was a sure thing and I looked at the ending I’d like to have with this guy and then looked at what was happening and it didn’t measure up at all. That was my answer, and it was decided. If I were to ignore this, I honestly would’ve done nothing but allow these two to treat me in a way I wouldn’t think of treating myself.

If we have a connection to something [romantic interest, job, etc.], treat the situation as if you’ve been in it for years and remove the newness, the glamor, the uncertainty and the mask and see it from the angle of what your life looks like with it years from now instead, and see it from that perspective where it’s already yours and you are already getting what you want out of it, then compare that to what you are currently getting out of it, and that’s the standard it should be measured by.

It’s always at its best in the beginning, and if the beginning falls short of what you want to see out of it years from now, walk away from it.

#3 Being an Empath doesn’t have to be a Curse… [it’s not about saying ‘no’]

Persona December 2016

What does constantly being hurt do to empaths?

Empaths learn quickly what being taken advantage of feels like and if we don’t lash out, we withdraw and minimize everything about who we are. We aren’t truly happy unless we can make others happy, so we learn to placate, which serves two purposes… it keeps us at arm’s length from others while barely allowing us to fulfill a piffle of what we truly need to thrive.

The best environment for empaths is one with mutual respect, freedom to do what we truly love doing, and doing it when we want to do it. We ultimately could have this, but that determines what we do with our dreams and abilities. For a lot of us, right now we are “here” and deal with it however we can. While I’m in transition of leaving my job and living my dream, I didn’t want to deal anymore, I wanted to change it altogether, and with full intention.

TRANSFORMING HOSTILE ENVIRONMENTS

[Experiencing hurt shouldn’t keep us withdrawn and cut off in a hostile environment]

Where I work is so harsh for me and I used to go home in tears most days. I adapted by staying in my cube the 7 hours I was at work and placating others to keep my own sanity. I felt small and unimportant, so that’s how I acted. I avoided drama and any negativity and that meant that I didn’t really speak to anyone.

I recently discovered how to come out of myself enough to Love others because healing is part of my purpose, but other than that, I didn’t want to be around people or at work.

The wife of a patient stopped me in the hallway and told me she was getting something about who I was. I felt a kinship and we ended up talking about a lot of cool things and she said that she felt I was here at the hospital because I had a calm energy and soothing presence and that I was here to heal. I agreed. She then said that I was here to diffuse tension and drama… and that’s where she almost lost me because I did not want to have to step out of myself and interact in this environment – I worked really hard to stay under the radar. I also didn’t like how my intuition was insistent that she was right.

It ended up being a timely message and a necessary one. I wasn’t fulfilling my purpose at my job and if I didn’t come out of hiding and change that… well, I didn’t want to find out.

I innately knew where to start and it was in my immediate area. There are 15 of us that work together in a file room and to be fair, even though I never said anything, my attitude towards the toxicity was just as negative, so, how to figure this out…?

What are my strengths and how can I use them to change things? I knew I was good at healing others [making them feel heard], I have a calm and peaceful presence, and when I want something I make it happen. Okay then.

I know how to lead myself to change so I did that, but on a larger scale. Every morning I’d come into work with the intent to create a space where the six of us [our cluster] could come and be safe, experience non-judgment, honesty and peace.

Since others have the right to accept or reject this, I wasn’t sure if it would work on its own. I knew that where I came into play was setting my focus on healing our hearts, not changing our behavior. I thought that would be the hardest part because none of us had anything in common and, who was I to lead anyone. I did what I knew to do every morning for myself, I just changed it to include and meet the needs of all of us throughout the day. I created a new environment conducive to change, and began focusing on sending my coworkers Love and peace. Each time I encountered them, I made sure to give my full attention and help however I could. Most times I just listened to them and dissolve the tension by transmuting it [anyone can do this].

After a couple of months, everything had changed.

Days that we came in pissed would diffuse minutes later and we were laughing and making fun of each other. We grew close and are good friends and protect and support each other. We aren’t perfect, but we trust each other.

One of my colleagues has changed drastically and it turns out that she’s an empathy, and another is psychic. I’ve changed a lot through this and discovered that just opening up and being myself about what I believe on things, but making it relatable to everyday life, worked to the benefit of the group because I actually did know things, and they listened.

I realized through this whole experience that, even though chaos is all around us, if you lead with sanity and stability, others will follow. I found that I lead best by supporting the decisions of others to live their own truth, however they see fit. Those are the matters of the heart.